The Blades had hoped to catch Eddie Howe’s side at a good time after their midweek Champions League exploits in Milan but were 3-0 down inside 35 minutes and shipped five more in the second half.
With their goal difference taking a thumping, United fell to the bottom of the Premier League table - having not been in the bottom three before this weekend - and will have to pick themselves up off the canvas ahead of next weekend’s trip to West Ham United.
Here’s how our man scored United’s players, with some of the lowest ratings ever dished out on an embarrassing afternoon at Bramall Lane...

5. Jack Robinson 4
A typical Robinson-type tackle, the type we saw so often last season, risked a red card in the Premier League, VAR era when he got the ball in a challenge with Longstaff but a lot of the Newcastle man in his follow-through. It was a decision he seemed to accept, if thousands of Blades fans didn’t, but from the resulting free-kick Botman headed the visitors 3-0 ahead. | AFP via Getty Images

6. Luke Thomas 3
Had two early chances to make it a different day for United, one which saw an effort well blocked and another that he couldn’t get on target. From there Newcastle took total control and their fourth came after he left acres of space down the left for Trippier to pick out Wilson with an excellent cross. | Getty Images

7. Vini Souza 3
Will have had his heart in his mouth when he surrendered possession cheaply in the run-up to what looked like Newcastle’s fifth goal, but Almiron’s finish from close-range was ruled out for offside after Foderingham saved from Gordon. Booked for an aerial challenge with Anderson that left the Newcastle man on the deck, which was the only real time United laid a glove on Newcastle | AFP via Getty Images

8. Ollie Norwood 4
Showed good defensive awareness to snuff out a dangerous Wilson run but it was a chastening afternoon for United’s midfielders. Almost put Foderingham in real trouble with a weak backpass which was intercepted but fortunately went out of play, the midfielder holding his hands up to acknowledge the error | Getty Images

