'I had to go back to work the day after losing my baby - but now the law is changing'
Dad who lost baby to stillbirth had to return to work the next day
A father who lost his son to stillbirth says he had to drive back to Chesterfield and return to work the next day, leaving him unable to grieve for months.
Daniel, aged 39, was living in Chesterfield when he and his wife Joy Kabiri, 33, lost their son Elkan at 22 weeks’ gestation on September 1, 2025.
The couple say their loss came after missed opportunities in Joy’s maternity care, which were later acknowledged by the hospital where there son was delivered.
Daniel, a college lecturer, drove from Oxford, where the couple had been when Elkan was born, back to Chesterfield to work the following day.
He says he was told he was not entitled to bereavement leave under his employment contract.
“I left Oxford at 12am, drove back to Chesterfield, had a few hours of rest and went to work the next day,” he said.
“I never got to say goodbye to my son before he was sent to the mortuary as I had to leave him in the delivery suite to go back to Chesterfield for work.
“I spoke to my manager at the time, and they said it was not in my employment contract policy to have leave.
“I was a lecturer, imagine going back into class after all of that. I never got to mourn my child until a month or two after.
“Going straight back into work, thinking of my wife, it’s a lot for a man to go through. I felt like I didn’t get that support in the most crucial time.”
The couple’s experience comes ahead of new bereavement leave rights due to come into force in April 2027.
The changes will give workers whose pregnancy ends before 24 weeks, including through miscarriage, termination or an unsuccessful IVF embryo transfer, the right to up to two weeks of unpaid leave. The entitlement will also cover partners, other biological parents and intended parents in surrogacy arrangements.
The new rights will apply from the first day of employment, with leave available flexibly over 56 weeks. They follow campaigning by bereaved families and support organisations, with charities continuing to call for bereavement leave to be paid.
Daniel said he welcomed the changes and hoped they would give other parents the recognition and time to grieve that he did not receive.
“I’m very happy it’s come into play and others can have that recognition,” he said.
The couple had spent five years trying to conceive and had booked a round of IVF before Joy fell pregnant naturally.
Joy discovered she was pregnant in June 2025.
Elkan was born stillborn on September 1.
Following an internal investigation, Oxford University Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust apologised to the family and acknowledged failings in aspects of Joy’s care.
Joy said she was supported by her employer but returned to work in January 2026 because she was told her pay would stop if she did not.
She said losing Elkan before 23 weeks meant she could not access the same maternity leave entitlement as someone who lost a baby later in pregnancy.
The couple have since launched charity Elkan’s Light to support families affected by baby loss and raise awareness of the issues they believe contributed to their son’s death.
An Oxford University Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust spokesperson said: “We are deeply sorry for the loss of Joy and Daniel’s baby boy, Elkan, and we acknowledge that we did not get Joy’s care right.”
Sheena Hall, a specialist lawyer at Fletchers Solicitors who is supporting the couple, said: “Joy and Daniel have shown incredible strength in speaking about what happened to Elkan and in using their experience to campaign for change.
“Their story highlights the importance of listening to women and acting on concerns during pregnancy, particularly when there are known risk factors that should be taken into account.”
The couple’s charity website is [elkanslight.org.uk](https://www.elkanslight.org.uk/).