Being grumpy costs Andy small fortune

Andy Wilcock with daughters Pippa, 10, and Mary, 12.
Andy Wilcock with daughters Pippa, 10, and Mary, 12.
Have your say

WHAT’S the best way to cure a grumpy old man of his grumpiness?

Hit him where it hurts most… in his pocket – and if you can raise money for charity at the same time so much the better.

So now every time father-of-two Andy Wilcock feels the urge to complain about advancing middle age and the pains of parenthood he has to pay up to leading dementia charity Lost Chord.

Andy, pastor at Hampden View Wesleyan Reformed Church in Walkley, Sheffield, was bought his Grumpy Collecting Tin as a 43rd birthday present by daughter Mary, aged 12.

With it came a price list for grumpy outbursts – 20p for general complaining, 50p for having a moan and £1 for a full-scale rant.

Younger daughter Pippa, 10, suggested the money go to Lost Chord, which provides musical experiences for people with dementia.

Andy said: “It was supposed to be a bit of a joke but it is costing me. I don’t mind too much though because the money we’re raising is going to Lost Chord.

“We know all about the charity because my wife Anne-Marie is a volunteer who helps at their concerts.”

Until now, Andy has had to pay up for complaining the TV is too loud, pointing out his daughters’ stuff should not be left all over the floor and passing comment on the cost of school trips and the fact he really cannot be classed – at 43 – as a grumpy old man.

“Some mornings I’ll still be in my dressing gown at 8am and I’ll already have run up a bill of £2.90,” Andy said.

“I’m not really grumpy – and if I am it’s only because I have two daughters in the house!”