Viva our Victoria...

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Once again, Vicks is getting up people’s noses. What’s her cardinal sin this time? Arriving separately from her former bandmates for the opening of the Spice Girls Musical in London’s West End.

Too Posh To Push is now Too Posh To Pose with her former BFs on the red carpet.

While they were flashing flesh and expensive dental work for the paps, she was deemed aloof - for quietly walking in with her husband and their children.

Oh my God, though. Wouldn’t YOU keep your distance - from both the Spice Girls line-up and the musical featuring their hit songs if both turned out to be as tacky as you’d feared they would be?

If you’d turned up in a simple, smart trouser suit and white shirt, your only extravagance a pair of killer spike heeled courts, would you REALLY want to stand next to a quartet of over-done Barbie dolls?

Bare limbs slathered in fake tan and tattoos, all bigged up hair and bosoms, they looked like ageing TOWIE extras desperately out on the pull.

Geri was wearing a tiered wedding cake, Mel C’s sequinned frock, surely loaned from a drag queen, was slashed almost to her knicker-line and Mel B’s frilly khaki asymmetric thing looked straight off the market. Apart from the see-through lace skirt, Emma looked OK.

VB, standing slightly to one side, hand in pocket of a nice bit of tailoring during the on-stage finale, totally outclassed them.

As for Viva Forever! it seems doomed from Day One. Reviewers have already labelled it not so much a lavishly spiced Christmas pudding as cold Christmas turkey.

It’s the story not of the Spice Girls’ rise to fame, but the tale of one girl, Viva (what is her surname? Vauxhall?). She and her best friends get swept up in TV celebrity culture and overnight fame impacts on their relationship.

It was always going to be less about them and more about making them money - particularly important to the ones for whom after-Spice life didn’t turn out quite so nice.

Victoria doesn’t need the show’s dosh. She was smart enough to marry a football legend in his own lifetime - and she’s created a great career for herself.

While the other four were still on the showbiz hamster wheel, she found she could be really, really good at designing classy, elegant clothes.

I didn’t much like VB in her Spice days. Or in the ensuing years, when she pranced around with fake hair and fake boobs (the latter always strenuously denied, which made me dislike her even more).

But I admire her now. She’s maintained a marriage, she’s bringing up four children who seem incredibly well-adjusted considering the huge chunk of limelight their family has to absorb.

She did what we did; she grew up. Realised that some friendships DO end, and you can’t look like a teenager, or act like one, forever.

Take your bow, Mrs B...

Viva Victoria.