Muses from under the duvet as I struggle to change the cover

Like many I am experiencing self-isolation for the first time and discovering a whole new life and realising a set of new priorities.

In life’s great ritual, with many suffering from the serious consequences of the Coronavirus crisis, my trials and tribulations are minor i.e. have I got enough batteries for the TV remote control or even worse has my Henderson’s Relish run out?

I’ve had to face up to the challenge of changing the bedding and life’s ultimate one of changing the dreaded duvet cover! This is a task I have happily delegated (abdicated) to others in the past.

Sadly, that task befalls me now.

Nothing can psychologically prepare the uninitiated for this as I have found to my cost.

Naive and overconfident, I launch myself with gusto without a plan, habits of lifetime are hard to shake off.

Oh my goodness, I discover it is not as easy as I thought it would be and collapse exhausted on the very bed I am trying to change.

As Wellington always said, know where your line of retreat is.

So, what do I do, I fall at the first fence and withdraw regroup, to recuperate and watch TV.

Alas in my panic, I mislaid the remote control - but worse was still to come.

As I tore around the house I tripped on the bedding on the floor, fortunately not damaging myself other than my pride and not embarrassing myself further by requiring the services of the hard pressed ambulance service who are currently dealing with more pressing priorities.

However, a worse fate beholds me, I had to return to changing the duvet cover.

After a sharp intake of breath, I recommence, reflecting on the person who invented duvet covers, who should be tried for crimes against humanity.

Totally unjustified, of course, but a reflection of me not coping with what most people do apparently without difficulty and my frustration.

I also reflected during this trial of mental resilience and physical stamina (me failing miserably on both accounts) that there is no need to interrogate criminals, just threaten them with changing a duvet cover, a quick result would be guaranteed.

I finally finish the task, fortunately a performance not witnessed by others and/or subject to video replay or worse VAR.

A triumph of brute force and sheer ignorance over executing a thoughtful well executed plan.

Then a thought struck me.

Already in awe of NHS workers coping magnificently as they have always done, I now reflected on how many beds they will have changed. Just imagine the sheer number they change efficiently every single day.

So I reflect on more serious matters, relieved that the duvet cover is changed, TV remote found and that I’ve still got half a bottle of Henderson’s Relish left in the cupboard.

I wondered whether we take our NHS for granted?

Have we given NHS workers all the tools they need to do the job?

With so many NHS vacancies before the COVID-19 crisis, have they got even now the respect and personal protection equipment they need?

Finally have we all done enough in helping to prevent being an extra burden on the NHS by overeating and drinking and under exercising?

I need to use this present crisis to become fitter too – by exercising personal motivation and action - so that stuffing a duvet is not designated a future Olympic event.

Sadly, qualification in my present state is out of question, so no need to hold back page.

I also reflect and hope that Organ Donation presumed consent becomes law this spring.

This should save hundreds of lives of those currently waiting for their lives to be saved and currently living in fear.

Hopefully we can embrace this, after hopefully surviving the current crisis, and reflect on our obligations to others.

Let us hope our biggest challenge is indeed to change a duvet cover, and not our fellow citizens losing their lives and NHS Workers put at risk by us not following public health guidelines.

There is much to think about while in self isolation.

- Are you self-isolating and ready to share your thoughts with Star readers? We love reading your opinions on our letters pages – email [email protected] to feature.

But if you fancy a bigger challenge and would like to write a column about life in Sheffield during these strange times, email your ideas, suggestions and photos to editor Nancy Fielder, [email protected]