Crunching numbers

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He sounds very convincing, that chap on the new toothpaste advert.

He must be real; not an actor being paid to pretend.

The need to protect that bit of your teeth that is embedded in your gum; he sold it to me.

But then I noticed the small-print at the bottom of the screen.

In a survey of 250 dentists, 65 per cent recommended the toothpaste, it said.

Only 250? That barely cuts a tooth-mark in the UK dental profession. And only 162 and a half of them thought this particular toothpaste was worth using. I don’t think I’ll bother now.

I reckon money would be far better spent on making a commercial informing folk of an important but little-known piece of dental hygiene advice that actually costs you nowt...

Dentists (no, I don’t know how many) recommend you keep your toothbrush at least six feet away from a toilet. Because airborne particles fly up into the air every time some flushes the loo.

How many have already landed on your bristles simply doesn’t bear thinking about.