They say your schooldays are the happiest days of your life - and if you can remember these, you'll go straight the top of the class as a Sheffield schoolchild of the 70s and 80s.
1. Possessing about 200 scented rubbers
If your pencil case didn't smell like the inside of a 'fragrances by Lenthéric' factory' you just couldn't hang with the cool kids. This even applied to the boys.
2. Trying to break a Shatterproof ruler
Shatterproof? We'll soon see about that. Most met their end in a woodwork vice or bunsen burner. Never challenge a 13-year-old.
3. Typing 'words' on an upside down calculator
You only have to show the numbers 58008 or 55378008 to a 70s or 80s child and they'll instantly start sniggering. 07734, is it fun your'e looking for?
4. Programmes For Schools And Colleges
The countdown clock minutes gradually disappearing second by second in the school hall ahead of the truly disturbing and nightmare inducing titles and theme music of Picture Box.
5. Vandalised school text books
Historical figures from Hitler to Queen Victoria had their legacies ruined in graphic sexual detail in dog-eared, hand-me down books by any rascal with a biro.
6. Trying to dazzle the teacher with your oversized digital watch
Bright sunshine streaming in through the classroom windows? Then turn your Casio into an impromptu laser. One reflection on the blackboard would soon lead to a scene reminiscent of dancing fireflies.
7. You know the connection between torn-up newspaper, a balloon and water and flour
How every child everywhere made a papier mache mask that looked a bit like, erm, a load of wet newspaper stuck to a balloon.
8. A Christmas card postbox in the school corridor
It mysteriously arrived every mid-December - and then each day some smug pupil would have the task of dishing out its contents. Kudos to those with more cards than Clintons.
9. A TV in a cabinet on wheels being rolled into class
"We're watching TELLY! At school!" Oh, hang on, its a dry as bones documentary about Tudor Britain. Zzzzz.
10. Vandalising your pencil case
What better way to spell your love for MUFC, Nik Kershaw or Haircut 100 by daubing it on your pencil case (preferably turned inside out) with Tippex? Or as it was called back then, Liquid Paper...
11. Taking part in 'movement'
Everyone find a space - we're going to pretend to be a tree, to some light orchestral noodling music. And streeeetch...
12. Predicting the future with a paper fortune teller
Pick a colour. R-E-D. Pick a number. Four. 1-2-3-4. You're going to get married to Sally Smith from class two. Get lost, don't even fancy her.
13. Covering your books
In much the same way as pencil cases were a statement of your tastes, your text books were an open canvas to rip pages from Smash Hits or Shoot! The poor kids used wallpaper offcuts when 'backing.'
14. Sitting in your coat in the classroom in winter
Being sent home from school for snow didn't happen in the 70s and 80s. Minus 18 and a broken boiler? Tough. Get your parka and mittens on and quit moaning.
15. Summer mornings during the school holidays
Yay! The summer's here -So Why Don't You Switch Off Your Television Set And Go Out And Do Something Less Boring Instead? Or alternatively stay in all day and watch The Littlest Hobo, Heidi, badly-dubbed European folk tales and endless re-runs of Huckleberry Finn.
16. Nobody played tennis, but everybody had a Head bag
Quite how an obscure company that made bags for ski equipment and tennis players became the must-have brand around Sheffield schoolyards is lost in the annals of history, but the fact was that anyone who was anyone had a Head bag.
17. That day a dog came into the playground
No explanation needed. You remember this, and it was the best day ever.