All a bit tasty in the dining room

It wasn't what they signed up for... despite the name on the side of their cruise ship.

The Spirit of Adventure was 100 miles off the coast of Zanzibar this week, with its 350 elderly Saga passengers just sitting down to a posh black tie dinner when an emergency erupted.

No, there were enough bread-rolls to go round. No-one had parked themselves at the wrong table and the waitresses hadn't lost the fish forks.

Somali pirates were chasing the ship! Their speedboat was just two miles away and closing fast.

The elderly British cruisers calmly took the news in their ever so slightly wobbly stride, as so many elderly Brits have done all their lives since Hitler attempted to bomb them out of their beds as children.

They downed their soup spoons. They calmly – and slowly, I imagine – made their way below decks with their heads down in case they were shot at through the windows. There they waited until the captain had outrun the Somali vagabonds.

Then they went back to their safely reheated soup.

How much more exciting than a night of cabaret and queueing to book next day's coach trip.

Got a view? Leave a comment below.

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