Looking Back: Does looking after your man give you immense personal satisfaction?

File photo dated 14/2/2023 of the artwork by street artist Banksy, titled 'Valentine's Day Mascara' on the side of a building in Margate, Kent. The artwork depicts a 1950's housewife, wearing a classic blue pinny and yellow washing up gloves, with a swollen eye and a missing tooth seemingly shoving her male partner into a chest freezer. The £6 million work has been lifted by crane into a new exhibition in London. Issue date: Tuesday September 12, 2023. PA Photo. See PA story ARTS Banksy. Photo credit should read: Gareth Fuller/PA Wire

It seems that January is known as ‘Divorce Month’ due to the number of meetings with divorce lawyers. The stress of Christmas with couples being thrown together for longer periods apparently exacerbates difficulties in a marriage.

A far cry from the old days in the 1950s when a wife particularly was told ‘If you make your bed, you must lie in it!’ if making any complaints about her relationship.

Mothers were always ready to give their daughters good advice. ‘A good wife always knows her place’ was a frequent maxim.

Even at secondary schools girls could be encouraged to concentrate on subjects like domestic science and needlework, whilst learning shorthand and typing after leaving school could lead to a coveted position as secretary to the boss and possibly romance and marriage. What more was there to aspire to?

Couples often start divorce proceedings in January after deciding to make a fresh start in the new year

If a wife was unhappy and shared the fact with friends or family, she could be told ‘He provides for you. Where will you go?’ which actually was a valid point then with women having few rights.

It did seem to many women that their man was their sole purpose for living at that time.

Wanting a job could be thought of as selfish when your role was to stay at home, look after the house and be a good mother. What else was there in life? You certainly couldn’t do both.

Magazines of the day like Woman’s Own gave advice on ‘How to please your man!’

It was important that you never bothered him with any petty troubles you might have. His day was much more important than yours, so you listened to his problems.

Your job was to provide a clean, quiet, and welcoming home, greeting him each evening looking trim and groomed, pinny off, lipstick on, and with a tasty meal ready to serve. Children invisible!

‘Be a little gay and interesting. He may have been surrounded with boring people at work.’

You were there to boost up his ego, provide him with a satisfying sex life no matter how tired you were and let him think he wears the pants.

‘And remember, catering for his comfort will give you immense personal satisfaction’.

Do you think women actually believed all that? And still do?