Comedian George Valentine is still telling gags at the age of 76 – and has nabbed the world record for most one-liners in a minute.
Hilarious George rattled off 62 rib-ticklers – less than one a second – to take the unofficial title for quick-fire funnies.
And gagmaster George reckons he has penned more than 110,000 one-liners since he came up with his first joke at the age of 12.
He also claims to have written the world’s shortest joke: “Obesity cures wrinkles”.
Retired George also helped famous stand-up Tim Vine regain his 2007 Guinness world record for the most jokes told in a hour – 499.
George, of Rotherham, has never been a full-time gag writer but has written material for some top names, including Bob Monkhouse, Tommy Cooper and Les Dawson.
He said: “I just did it for a hobby, it wasn’t a full-time job but then you would see them do them on the telly.
“It was amazing.”
Dad-of-two George, married to Valerie, 74, has attracted more than 215,000 followers on Twitter with his jokes.
Some more of George’s rib-ticklers
* 50 million wouldn’t buy Wayne Rooney and I am one of them.
* At university I sat an exam on Inheritance Tax. I got 40%.
* Cigarettes are killers that travel in packs.
* A replacement for electricity is light years away.
* 40 is the new 30, try telling that to a speed camera.
* Generosity in a Scotsman is the first sign of insanity.