The winner of the ‘Strong Medication’ award for 2014 is ...

Mario Balotelli
Mario Balotelli
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As excuses for inexcusable behaviour go, it’s got to be right up there.

UKIP parliamentary candidate Kerry Smith has been forced to issue a grovelling apology after he was nabbed by the Daily Mail when the paper got hold of a recording of him mocking gays, Chinese and ‘peasants’in his own party.

Caught red-white-and-blue-handed, you might say.

But his mitigation for the behaviour was absolute class and suggested an awards event to recognise its genius.

Mr Smith was, he insists, not himself after taking ’strong medication’ for a bad back. Medication so strong, apparently, that it made himsound like a homophobic bigot.

That’s some prescription.

Anyway Mr Smith’s outbursts could be the inspiration for the just-for-fun ‘Strong Medication’ awards made to people who say things they probably wish they hadn’t said as soon as they said them.

Footballers and managers are usually less offensive than the fragrant and delightful Mr Smith but there have been some absolute howlers this year.

Malky Mackay and his new boss at Wigan, Dave Whelan, would win the ‘Strong Medication Double Act’ award for their related outbursts - one uttered in private texts by Mackay and and the other in public in an agonising flurry of repeated defensive hole-digging by Whelan.

Clearly a decent man who has made Wigan into a thriving mid-sized club, Whelan appears to be out of touch with modern sentiment and his car-crash interviews as he tried to explain himself were excruciating.

Italian international Mario Ballotelli - himself a victim of racist abuse - would be a contender for the individual ‘Strong Medication’ award for the twitter outburst that got him on an FA charge under rule E3(1) for a post which appeared to contain anti-Semitic and racist references.

Andy Gray and Richard Keys could perhaps be invited to host the awards for past services to sexism.

All tongue in cheek but might make a fair counterpoint to the back-slapping goo-fest that the madly-expensive Sports Personality Of The Year awards have become.

Just a thought.