Take Two with Colin Drury

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DO you want an elected mayor, was the question asked on The Star’s front page on Thursday.

Allow this column to argue the case against: Doncaster.

That’s all.

SOME gossip arrives from Sheffield’s annual Varsity Trophy, the contest where the two universities go head to head in 40 sports.

A boxing match between Michael Thorne from the red brick and Hallam’s Alex Surron at the Octagon on Saturday had to be cancelled mid fight - and it wasn’t because of a knockout

Rather Michael, of Solly Street, had to pull out after the second round because of a nasty case of, um, the runs.

“He came back to the corner and said he had to go to the toilet,” says trainer Paul Watson. “I said that there’s no way, but we had to pull him out – it could’ve got embarrassing. He’d been poorly all week and you’ve got to feel sorry for him.”

Michael’s take on events was somewhat blunter.

“I was devastated to pull out,” he notes. “But it’s better than becoming a Youtube sensation for s***ing myself in the ring.”

GOOD to know we have a responsible government running the country, then.

Or not.

Because when it comes to mishandling a non-crisis, haven’t ministers proved themselves to be real experts over the last few days?

Sheffield’s petrol stations have been experiencing massive queues and there’s not even a fuel strike on.

But then what do you expect when you have leaders - men and women who are supposed to calm these sort of tensions - urging people to go out and panic buy.

I’m no expert but even I know that when people in power start talking about filling up jerrycans that’s only going, forgive the pun, to pour fuel on the flames.

Still, from Dave Cameron’s point of view, at least no-one’s talking about cash for access scandals or discriminative budgets any more, eh?