Take Two

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PARDON?

What’s that you say? You want Take Two to start today with a joke from The Star’s crack Christmas cracker testing session? Go on, then, if you insist...

What do you call a cow that plays guitar? A moo-sician.

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THE gift was even worse - a spinning top.

FAR far funnier perhaps is the case of mistaken identity which befell the Staffordshire-based All Woman Choir last weekend.

The 90 strong-group - consisting mostly of pensioners - were given a police escort as they travelled to a concert after officers mistook them for fans of our very own Chesterfield FC.

Police motorcyclists swooped on two coaches carrying the women last Saturday. They ordered the vehicles to follow them to Port Vale’s stadium 10 miles away where the Spireites were playing. It was only there, when an officer boarded, the mistake came to light and the women were allowed to go on their way.

Still, perhaps they would have enjoyed it if they’d stayed. Our boys ran out 2 - 0 winners.

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HATHERSAGE open air swimming pool is opening on New Year’s Day for its first ever cold water swim, then?

The pool - often fair chilly even in summer - will let brave (or should that be bbrrrave) dippers do lengths in aid of charity, as reported in this paper yesterday.

It’s a great idea. Although, it’s one this column would definitely rather support from the (dry) sidelines.

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WISH The Star luck.

Tonight is the annual Sheffield Hallam University Christmas Media Quiz (for chari-dee), and we’ll be doing our best to do your local paper proud.

Or at least we’ll be doing our best not to finish last, like last year.

Let’s just hope there’s no repeat of 2010 when the winners were, er, the Sheffield Hallam University media team.

Fix? Surely not.

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ANOTHER cracker joke to round things off? Well, why not...

What’s the best thing to put into a Christmas pudding? Your...teeth.

Ba-boom.