After three years in Sheffield, the inevitable finally happened – I went to Corp for the first time.
I’d never been before, mainly because I was never a student in Sheffield, I was never 18 in Sheffield and I never wanted to pay £5 to spend an evening in Sheffield.
Anyway, my friend decided to go there for her birthday, because it was obviously fun to do so past the age of 20 and she was nostalgic about her uni years.
I understand that and I think all of my friends had the best night.
I can imagine going back out in Paris where I used to spend my nights when I was younger and even though it wouldn’t really suit me now I’d definitely enjoy it.
But that nice feeling they had, I didn’t get it. All I got was Corp juice all over my shoes.
The fact it was in the middle of August didn’t help either.
I probably didn’t see it at its peak because all the students were away and Corp is one of the top places for students to go in Sheffield.
However, despite that it was still full of young people drinking blue, lollipop- smelling cocktails.
I ventured into the building only to find myself completely lost in a haze of sweet drinks.
As I was walking through what seemed to be a never- ending succession of rooms I started getting clautrophobic and nauseous.
I finally got to the top room, and sat down on the sticky seat and looked at people dancing.
They were laughing and shouting the lyrics of a song I didn’t know and I was sitting uncomfortably complaining about the smoke projector machine when it hit me, I might be too old for Corp. I never saw that coming.
At the age of 23 I thought I was too old for a variety of things – Barbie Dolls, thinking cooking is fun, believing everything I hear.
Club nights weren’t one of the things that I thought I would grow out of.
After 15 minutes of walking in circles I finally found my way to the smoking area where all my friends were.
I spent the next hour watching them smoking in a crowded place, thinking I’d just spent £5 doing what I could have done outside for free.
I felt old again when the guy behind me smiled, revealing the braces on his teeth.
I asked my friends what they likedso much about the place and the answers they came up with ranged from fun cocktails’ to ‘cheap drinks’ and then I got it.
I’m not too old for Corp. I’m just too sober.