The cheek of it, Madge

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While we’re on the subject of Madonna, I admit I’m feeling an unaccustomed wave of sympathy for her.

Her bottom is being compared most unfairly to Kylie’s; I think it’s a bit of a cheek. Actually, that’s precisely what everyone’s deriding Madge for.

She stepped out on stage the other week in a cheeky pair of shorts, unwittingly flashing a Heineken hindquarter; a flabby bit of butt hours in the gym clearly had not reached,

Just a week later, Kylie hops onto the Manchester Apollo stage in a pair of denim cut-offs and the comparisons begin.

Fair dinkum, the dinky diva’s derriere did look divine. But Kylie is 43 and Madge 53. A lot can emigrate south in a decade.