Relax, lads: we love you as you are

Stacy Keibler, left, and George Clooney arrive at the 15th Annual Hollywood Film Awards Gala on Monday, Oct. 24, 2011 in Beverly Hills, Calif. (AP Photo/Kristian Dowling)
Stacy Keibler, left, and George Clooney arrive at the 15th Annual Hollywood Film Awards Gala on Monday, Oct. 24, 2011 in Beverly Hills, Calif. (AP Photo/Kristian Dowling)
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Chaps, here is the most heartening piece of news you will ever hear.

You may be middle-aged and far from tall and hunky. You may consider yourself deeply ordinary and duller than dull.

But heck you’re selling yourself short.

Delve into your M&S crepe-soled moccasins and salvage your self-esteem

In fact, you are EXACTLY what most women really, really want.

Your ordinariness? It is your biggest attribute.

A study of 3,000 women by Orangina found that while men think they need to be strapping, six-foot Adonises to get the girl, the truth is so very different.

These women revealed that far from Clooney lookalikes, rugged hunks and a Superman type (minus the underwear as outerwear), they just want plain old, same old.

Their ideal male is of average height, looks, age and intelligence. In short, the someone they would like to set up home with is nothing much to write home about.

All they ask of Mr Average is that he has a reasonable sense of humour, a full-time job, knows how to cook... and doesn’t have ginger hair. (Only two per cent get hot for redheads).

I’d love to know where Orangina found so many women with such low expectations, though.

All they ask of Mr Average is that he has a reasonable sense of humour, a full-time job, knows how to cook... and doesn’t have ginger hair. (Only two per cent get hot for redheads).

I’d love to know where Orangina found so many women with such low expectations.