Boring, boring Chelsea.
Their fans must be queueing up for refunds after every game.
Their recent 0-0 at Arsenal and their slightly streaky 1-0 win over Manchester United characterise their discipline and control.
Boring, boring Chelsea.
Or so goes the chant of the jealous.
Would that all our local teams could be so boring.
How much exciting and eventually unsuccessful football does it take in a season to be better to watch than efficient and occasionally brilliant winners?
How many Wednesday and United fans would settle for a team as ‘boring’ as Jose Mourinho’s? How about all of them?
All of them and all of every other team’ss fans – with perhaps the exception of a few Arsenal ‘purists’ addicted to their image of stylish frailty and eventual failure.
How terrible must it be for Chelsea supporters to have to regularly watch six of the 11 players picked by the professional Footballers’ Association members in their Premier League Team of the Year.
How awful to witness Player of the Year Eden Hazard wreak his nimble-footed havoc week after week.
He’s that good you feel sorry for defenders who can either watch him or foul him or both but they can’t contain him.
Imagine the depths of misery in having to look at top-class defenders like John Terry and Dronfield’s Gary Cahill when they shut out the rest of the country’s - and the world’s in many cases – best strikers with their physical excellence and positional perfection.
They may be digging in to pick up the final points towards their seventh title now but remember their early-season form when they were tearing through every defence in the land.
Champions aren’t always the best-looking team for the whole season but they are always the best team.
Chelsea are the best team, Mourinho is the best manager and all the digs at their style is the jealous whining of losers.
If you think they have carved it out by playing hulking-great defenders in midfield and getting everyone behind the ball, treat yourself to the highlights of their season video when it comes out in May.
Look at Willian, Matic and Fabregas and find three better examples of midfield mastery.
You’ll see some glorious attacking football, great skill, pace and excitement, and most importantly you’ll see a team of winners led by a master manager.
Nothing is more boring than mediocrity, nothing more exhilarating than success.
If only all our teams were so terrible to watch as Mourinho’s ‘champions’.