YOU wonder why no one had thought about it before.
Sheffield, the city which gave the world cutlery by the canteen load, let alone all those sauceboats and sugar bowls, has now put it all to music.
Ladies and gentlemen, please give a big hand for the Cutlery Concerto.
That's what you can hear this Friday at the City Hall as the Sheffield Music Academy performs its world premiere.
The six minute piece, in words and music, has around a dozen singers and performers on knives, forks, spoons, sauceboats, sugar bowls, trays and salvers, all made out of Sheffield Plate of course.
It's a collaborative work by the performers themselves, to a title dreamed up by academy director John Grundy.
"It's wonderful. I'm really proud of them. Their creativity is astonishing. It's very tunefuI," he says as three of the performers assemble for a photocall outside the cathedral.
There is Alys Dennis on sugarbowl, Svea Hardwick on teaspoon and tablespoon and Emma Aspinall, also on spoons.
"Normally I am a violinist. I suppose there are some transferable skills!" says Alys.
In a sense, the City Hall piece is a rehearsal for a big concert at Sadlers Wells later in the month as the Government celebrates its music and dance programme.
What do you think? Post your comment below.The academy, held every Saturday, was formed as part of that initiative.
"We were asked to take a piece down. I wanted something specific to Sheffield," says John, who happily admits that after coming up with the title had no idea which way it would go.
Most of the "instruments" were bought on eBay for a few pence.
No one was willing to have the life bashed out of a family heirloom.
The gravy boat came all the way from Canada to its city of origin so at least it's getting a tuneful end.
Friday's performance is part of the Sheffield Children's Festival.
As well as the concerto, there will be performances of two chamber pieces by Beethoven and Shostakovich and, as the grand finale, a performance of Vivaldi's Gloria with the audience invited to join in.
John is still singing the praises of the Cutlery Concerto: "I can't get the main tune out of my head."
Tickets still available on 0114 281 4050. For more information visit
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The full article contains 408 words and appears in Sheffield Star newspaper.