THE Greeks are so fed up with boozed up British tourists they're begging our government to call time.
Hang on while I choke on my pina colada.
British tourists have been visiting Greece and Spain for years and no one has complained about the millions they pump into the economy.
A whole industry has been built around pouring drink down daft British tourists' throats and encouraging lewd behaviour.
It's certainly not acceptable and it's certainly not the way we should behave.
But one can't use alcohol to build tourism then complain when it all goes wrong.
In 1993 I visited Laganas on the Greek island Zakynthos. I strolled up and down the dozen bars on the newly emerging strip and watched turtles crawl ashore to lay their eggs in the soft unspoilt sand. It's certainly changed in those 15 years.
I hardly recognised the place when I saw drunken Brits spilling out of bars (and their clothes) on television this week.
We can heap the blame on stupid British tourists whose sole intention is to drink solidly for seven hot sunny days.
We can castigate their behaviour and talk of confiscating passports but isn't it about time the foreign bar owners took some responsibility too?
They're the ones who have lined their pockets with holidaymakers' Euros, they're the ones who negotiate ludicrously cheap alcohol deals and they're the ones who pay PRs to pull young tourists into their bars with the promise of cheap, and often free, booze.
It's not good enough to pass the buck and go crying to the Ambassador.
Sensible drinking is about responsibility. That goes for all of us but the Greek and Spanish authorities, licensees and police have got to play fair.
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