Having made what is (hopefully) the biggest commitment of their lives, girls get all of a dither over what to wear.

They either can't make the commitment, or they make it way too early. Let's hope they didn't make either of those mistakes when they selected the groom.

Some of them are ordering everything from frock to flowers, venue to photographer as much as two years in advance. Much of that is unavoidable because so many other couples are tying up their wedding arrangements so far in advance.

But how on earth can you know exactly how you want to look in 24 months' time?

What do you think> post your comment below.

Anything can happen in two years; you could gain a couple of stone, discover you're pregnant... or, perish the thought, change your mind about the groom.

These girls must rush out and hit the shops the moment the ring's on their finger. Whether it's out of sheer excitement, or of ensuring so much money has been spent that the groom doesn't back out, only she knows.

Half-way to the aisle, they change their minds, though. The frou-frou dresses they once thought were the vision of loveliness – and shelled out hundreds of pounds for – suddenly don't cut the mustard. The deflated meringues get stuck on to eBay with little messages saying: "Never been worn – changed my mind about it. Yours for half the price". And the silly, wasteful BTBs head off to scour the bridal stores once again, towing girlfriends now bored with the whole thing but trying not to let on that they think their bezzie's a silly cow.

This time around, the BTBs aren't breathy and blushing; they're cool, calm and intent on finding the exact opposite of what they had before. Something sleek and sophisticated. Figure-hugging with a fishtail.

They've grown up a bit since that heady, childlike, whirlwind of a shop for the frock that has sat in her mind's eye since she first hit the school dressing up box. They want something that makes them look like a woman.

But really, they should have thought about all that in the first place and curbed the urge to impulse-buy, buy, buy.

It doesn't stop at the dress, either. Chatrooms, forums and secondhand sites are crammed with unworn and now unloved veils, shoes, head-dresses, diamante combs and necklaces. Each one is accompanied by pretty much the same story: loved this, bought it, changed my mind.

It's ridiculous; a small fortune is being wasted on all of this stuff. I know because I've had a quick shufty through a few of them.

You see, the older, second-time-around bride's way is to spend as little cash as possible, mainly because we're picking up the bill. In your 40s, you have a much clearer idea of what suits you and what doesn't, what you want and what you don't want....
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